Reassesing

I didn't really love the concept of this blog as much as I thought I would at first.
I came to see it as a chore and did not look forward to writing it anymore.
I think it's because it had a set stramine. I tried to push myself towards doing something, and as fun as that might have seemed, I'm not one to be pushed, not even by myself.

So instead ... I am changing things up again.
This blog is simply for moments when I feel I need the need to share.
The post I most enjoyed doing was the music post, where I really shared everything about myself. The other ones were kind of meaningless dribble. However, I must say, I also really enjoyed writing the gibberish post.

So I suppose, as with all things in life, it's about finding a happy medium. A place where I share my thoughts and feelings, with a splash of nonsensical fun. Lets see how that goes ...

Express

  I failed on the drinking challenge, and I failed on the exercise challenge, but I have one hour left to not fail on the writing challenge.

I could see ‘express’ as ‘fast’, but I’d rather look at it as ‘to express yourself’. The Madonna line “express yourself, don’t repress yourself” comes to mind. I think it’s very important to express who you are, vocally, physically, fashionably. I used to repress who I really was, trying to be who I thought others wanted me to be, I was miserable. Now, I try to express myself by putting a bit of me in everything I do, whether that’s getting dressed in the mornings or writing something in the evenings. One thing I do still need to learn to do is to express myself vocally. I still avoid confrontation and am afraid to ask for something I deserve. It’s like I have finally found what I want to say; now I just need to vocalise it.

Gibberish

I've missed a day ... again. I was actually quite looking forward to writing this one. But Saturday was a bit of a ... non-day. As was today, but I'm trying to redeem myself. So here goes ...

Lunchtime

Gosh this is a hard one ...

What was lunchtime like today? I fed the manchild a wrap with ham and cheese. Then I sent him up for quiet time and had a rather unhealthy lunch (mac and cheese) while I watched Desperate Housewives (would that be ironic?).

Thinking about lunch, I have to think about my absolute favourite lunch as a student ... a Martino. It's made out of Filet American (raw ground beef with egg), onions, pickles and the special "martino" sauce (ketchup, mustard and something spicy). I’d have it on a brown demi-baguette. So good, but impossible to find here in the UK. I think bakers would have a heart attack if I would try to ask for it.

Pear

A pear is green. It can be tart, or it can be sweet.
Sometimes spotted, it grows on a tree.
A pear is a healthy fruit I like to eat.

... A little rhyme that came to mind when I first thought about 'pear' ...

A pear is an autumn fruit. I have recently come to quite like the autumn. My favourite season used to be the summer. Now I think it is autumn. The reasons I used to like summer aren’t really there anymore. Maybe it’s because in my life it feels like summer is over and autumn has begun. The carefree, easy breezy days are over and it is time to start preparing for later. At the same time, fruits that have flowered and grown are now ready to be harvested (or at least should be). It’s like the preparation for life is over, and now it’s time to live.

Changing things up

This blog is getting very self-indulgent, sounding more like a personal diary than a writing exercise.
So I have decided to go in a different direction. From now on I will try to write 300 to 500 words on a random word every day, trying to relate the word to myself and my life.

I'll be using Creativity Tools' Random Word Generator.

Today's word is 'pear'.

Music and defining moments

As I mentioned before, I love music. And music has been a very important part of my life. In this post I’ll share the songs that have meant the most to me, and the songs that stand out from certain stages in my life. I'm sure these aren't all, or the only songs that have influenced me. But they are the ones that come to mind when I look back. Warning: it's rather long.

The Teeny Bopper stage

I first discovered music when I was probably about 10 years old. A bit late, but growing up TV and radio were a big no-no. I was a sucker for a catchy tune, and good looking boys. J

The Spice Girls - Wannabe
They were my first role models and I’ll always remember making up dances on the school playground to their songs. I was Baby Spice.

Aqua – Barbie Girl
The first CD I bought for myself, with my own pocket money.

Backstreet Boys - Everybody
Nick was my boy.

5ive - When the lights go out
I swooned over Scott and later Jay.

Westlife - If I let you go
I just loved the sound of their voices, even though I didn’t find any of them particularly attractive.

Whitney Houston – It’s not right but it’s okay
This was at the end of the pop stage. This song meant a lot to me and really affected how I would go about having relationships. Even though I first heard it long before having grown up relationships, it stuck with me. I think it helped me be a stronger person and get over people hurting me.